Disney senior

"It's a new channel," said the executive, his grin as wide as his shoulders and less sincere. "We've taken inspiration from Disney Junior and gone with Disney Senior. We expect big things and bigger ad-revenue."
Nita nodded, and turned the page in the portfolio the executive had laid in front of her. It contained full-colour pages of the characters that were proposed as part of the Disney Senior channel, with smaller pages of text interspersed here and there to provide more detail.
"What character would you put on first," she asked, her voice deceptively mild.
"We were thinking that it would very appropriate to start with a true classic," said the executive flipping open a filofax. "We thought we'd have a new headliner show called Grandfather Mickey."
"I see," Nita nodded again. "Have you spoken to anyone in the marketing department yet? Only I think we're a little concerned about the impact your scripts would have on marketing strategies."
"Wuh?" The executive gaped.
"Strategies." Nita enunciated the word slowly and carefully. "Look, your first episode is about Grandfather Mickey going to buy incontinence pants for Grandmomma Minnie, meeting Old-timer Goofy there and the pair of them getting confused. Goofy goes home with the incontinence pants, which he sticks a turkey in and puts in the oven, while Grandfather Mickey goes home with a turkey-baking bag, which Grandmomma Minnie puts on, apparently oblivious to what it really is."
The executive was laughing hard and slapping his knee as though he thought it were truly pants-wettingly funny.
"Well," Nita said patiently, "what are we going to brand as a result of this? Disney don't do incontinence pants, and that's not going to change in the near future. We can't realistically do turkey-baking bags after this airs, or kids will try wearing them, with possibly disastrous consequences."
"We're not targetting kids!" The executive wheezed as he tried to stop laughing and get his breath back. "We're targetting senior citizens. That's why we're calling it Disney Senior and using all the oldest characters." He wheezed into the icy silence that followed when he finished speaking. Only when it became clear he wasn't going to get the hint did Nita speak again.
"We've no experience addressing this market segment," she said carefully. "And, and this is the wonder of cartoons, our characters never age. Mickey will never reach old age, nor will Minnie or any of the rest. Donald Duck is as young today as he was thirty years ago, and that won't change. This idea has no wheels, and is not going to run."
"But let's let the characters age, and capture a new market segment! Old people sit at home all day anyway, they can watch Disney Senior!"
"What are they going to buy?"
The executive's face went blank again.
"Old people are not a particularly wealthy market segment, and they've often either got everything they want, or don't have the money to buy it. There are no parents, or even children, waiting around to help out. So who's going to buy merchandise from this channel? Or advertising on it?""
"Well... can't we go down the selling them wills and things route?"
"That's part of the contract when they purchase access to the channel."